Mitch McConnellHey Mitch, good to see you.

Yep.

How’s business back in Washington?

Fine.

Keeping those Democrats in their place, huh?

Yep.

OK, well let’s have us a look at those old choppers.

Open, please.

Open.

Open, please.

Open.

A little wider, please Mitch.

Oooopen.

Senator, I can’t check your teeth if you don’t open your mouth for me.

Open.

Open.

Open open open open open.

Come on, Mitch. All I can see are those five pointy little brown ones along the bottom. I need you to open your mouth so I can check the rest.

Open wide, now.

Open.

Open your mouth.

Open it.

You open your mouth now, or I’m going to slice you open and you’ll need safety pins to close it, you old fool.

I’m warning you, McConnell.

Just so you know, I never voted for your backwards ass. You want me to cut you, I’ll cut you.

Fine. This is going to be fun.

OK, rinse please.

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